Diamond Nipples OF STEEL

I’m on all sorts of records having said that I’ve not even the fleeting interest in reading Superman.  He’s a very boring character, I thought.  Too pedestrian, despite his power.  Too reserved.  Too nice.  But then I started reading Supergirl because she wears a miniskirt and, well, she was my gateway kryptonian and now I’ve got Superman #700 right in front of me and I’m eagerly anticipating the new Superboy book.

I jumped onto Superman for a number of reasons.  Supergirl got me interested in the mythology, the number is nice and round and, well, JMS is taking over.  Very exciting.  JMS wrote one of the only Spider-Man stories I’ve enjoyed unconditionally and got very angry when they made him write One More Day – he also wrote an amazing Thor story until Marvel basically forced him out of a job with the appropriately titled Siege storyline.  So now he’s on Superman.

I hate the cover.  And actually most of the interior pencils.  All of the Supermans – none of them looked to have the right face.  I mean, that cover looks like the Superman from a billion years ago in the forties – and protip that wasn’t even the same Superman.  There was an ad inside for Sin and Punishment that had better pictures, seriously.  But I only had a minor issue with the pencils, truth be told.  I mostly liked the book.  Which I found surprising knowing that most of the internet found it boring.

And if any of my colleagues want to throw some hyperlinks in here to some negative reviews, I’d much appreciate it.  I don’t have any on hand.

Anyway, I didn’t really dislike any of what I read.  The first story (Robinson and Chang; The Comeback) was actually really sweet.  I think we all needed to see a reunion between Lois and Clark considering that he’d spent so much time recently on New Krypton.  The second story (Jurgens; Geometry) was really odd.  It was backwards filler, back when Dick was Robin.  It was a really oddly placed story, but it was a fun little bit of fluff.  The last page puts a smile on the face.

It was the Grounded Prologue written by JMS that was a bit iffy, and attracted the negative publicity.  I didn’t dislike it, to be frank and upfront, but I understand why.  Some woman comes up to Superman and slaps him in the face – the man who just lost his entire planet and species, again – claiming that, while he was off Earth saving that Earth from being destroyed, he let her husband die of a brain tumour.

HOW DARE SUPERMAN BE DOING HIS JOB INSTEAD OF CATERING TO YOUR SELFISH NEEDS?

The worst part was that Superman actually let it get him down, and now he’s going on a soul searching walk around America.  (America, not the WORLD).  And apparently this has been done and I can see how this is all very annoying as far as characters and plotting goes but, but I don’t know.  Reading it wasn’t that bad.  I yelled at that dumb selfish bitch, sure, and I wanted Superman to respond differently, but it still didn’t make for a horrible read.  But if JMS lets it go for too long, then well, I think I’ll get very bored by it.  I don’t really want to be bored by the Superman stories just I’ve jumped onto the title, ya know?

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